


Skinny Skinny

by castivak



Series: Whumptober 2020 [16]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Dean Winchester Not Being an Asshole, Depression, Fainting, Gen, Hurt Jack Kline, Jack Kline & Dean Winchester Bonding, Jack Kline Has a Soul, Jack Kline Needs A Hug, Post-Episode: s15e13 Destiny's Child, Pre-Episode: s15e14 Last Holiday, Spider-Man References, Starvation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-17
Updated: 2020-10-17
Packaged: 2021-03-09 03:33:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,945
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27058015
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/castivak/pseuds/castivak
Summary: jack can't remember the last time he'd been out of his room for more than ten minutes, knowing that several days had passed but that was the thing about all this; he couldn't separate days anymore, all of them blending together as he continued to do the same thing day by day, only knowing if it was day or night by the small clock on the bottom corner of his laptop screen telling him that it was am or pm, like it even mattered if he was awake at five in the afternoon of five in the morning.
Series: Whumptober 2020 [16]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1947061
Comments: 1
Kudos: 36





	Skinny Skinny

**Author's Note:**

> Day Sixteen : Unconscious
> 
> on a technical level, jack is unconscious during a time period of this story.
> 
> tw : references to disordered eating.
> 
> title from skinny skinny by ashton irwin

jack's been hurt before, in so many different ways, but nothing like this.  
  
a heavy pain that settled in his head and chest, keeping him awake at night but also draining all energy from him, only being able to change his clothes every day because it was some form of control in his life that he felt the need to cling onto, wanting something to be what _he_ wanted.  
  
it was agony; staying inside his room, going between dissociating while his laptop plays video or sleeping for too many hours in a row. although, a couple nights he had waited until he was sure that sam and dean were in bed, sneaking into the kitchen and actually letting his body get the food it needed, normally depriving himself of that as he just hurt too much to get up from his bed and walk to the kitchen, which was directly next to his room and only took twenty steps to get to.  
  
those nights normally ended in him bloated and regretful, cleaning up a shameful mess before going back into his room to hide, laying beneath blankets that should be changed and staring at his laptop to get any tiny bits of serotonin he could from the same marvel movie that he's seen a billion times because peter parker was just a kid with a too much responsibility, one of the few differences between him and jack was that peter succeeded in defeating the villain.  
  
jack will probably fuck that up too when the time came, it would just make sense for him to fail at saving the world, wouldn't it?  
  
every day, at least once, sam and dean would check on him; it was always short check ins, just little updates that were usually about if castiel had found any progress on amara or what was being made for dinner, giving a gentle knock on the door and informing him through the wood.  
  
they never opened the door, which was something that jack really appreciated because he really did not want them to come into the room that he couldn't understand why they were letting him stay in and see how terrible he was living inside of it, tainting their home with his presence.  
  
jack can't remember the last time he'd been out of his room for more than ten minutes, knowing that several days had passed but that was the thing about all this; he couldn't separate days anymore, all of them blending together as he continued to do the same thing day by day, only knowing if it was day or night by the small clock on the bottom corner of his laptop screen telling him that it was am or pm, like it even mattered if he was awake at five in the afternoon of five in the morning.  
  
time had become unimportant, not needing to know that he had gone yet another day of doing nothing besides sulking like a pathetic child.  
  
jack let out a heavy sigh, turning his head away from his laptop and moving his gaze to the ceiling, his body still aching like it had been for days, only this time his head and stomach were specifically hurting, his head dully aching all the way around, from his eyes to the base of his skull, and making his stomach swirl along with it, dizzy and nauseous as hell and wishing that he could sleep through it again, but there was too much pressure for him to sleep peacefully.

and even if he does sleep, he'll probably wake up feeling even worse and a nightmare might decide to drop by for the pity party.  
  
"....... _c'mon spiderman._ "  
  
jack looked back at his laptop to watch the dimly lit scene of his favorite hero, a quick and small smile appearing on the blonde's face when peter broke out of the building, having seen this scene a million times but still getting a sense of pride and joy when peter manages to save himself and then proceed to be the hero that is needed.  
  
the fact that peter can lift a building off himself so that he could save his city but jack can't even leave his room to save the entire world was so pathetic that is almost hilarious.  
  
jack slammed his laptop shut, not caring that the movie wasn't over yet because suddenly the idea of watching a character that he held so dear do such a gargantuan task despite physical trauma while he couldn't even do basic human things with a perfectly healthy body made him want to cry; great, now he couldn't even turn to fiction for comfort.  
  
a low grumble came from jack's stomach, adding to his nausea as the organ had literally nothing inside of it and was desperately asking for sustenance. now, he could do what he's been doing for the past however many days and use his grace to tell his stomach to shut up, but he needed to break this suffocating cycle somehow and this was his chance to do so.  
  
the nephilim slowly sat up, his head throbbing a little from the task as if it needed to remind him that it was still aching, and he pushed his blanket off of him, sitting on the edge of his bed and staring at his bedroom door, seeing the hallway light slipping in from the small space at the bottom.  
  
it was just ten steps, ten steps from his bed to the door.  
  
with a deep breath, jack stood up from his bed, vision going weird for a moment but it went back to normal soon enough and he slowly walked the ten steps to his bedroom door, even putting his hand on the doorknob but not turning it.  
  
it was just ten steps, ten steps from his bedroom to the kitchen.  
  
jack turned the doorknob and pushed the door open, his heart pounding a little heavier in his chest at the possibility of seeing sam and dean because he had no idea what time it was and they very well could be in the kitchen.  
  
its just ten steps.  
  
with another deep breath, jack stepped out of his bedroom, shutting the door behind him and suddenly feeling extremely exposed, getting the urge to go back into his room and stay in there for a few more hours, but he managed to ignore the part of him that was screaming at him and he took a few steps towards the kitchen, doing so slowly as his head was still hurting and the movement made it worse, his stomach still angrily asking for food as he went way too slow for it's liking.  
  
"........c'mon jack." he whispered to himself, trying to see if peter's method would work, taking another two steps before putting a hand on the wall as his head spun, making his vision go wonky and his whole body feel awful, breathing a little heavy to try and get his insides to calm down enough for him to get to the kitchen.  
  
it's just five steps, five more steps and he'd be in the kitchen.   
  
his head pounded as it told him not to dare move, but his stomach cramped to get him to move faster and jack groaned, just wanting to be able to function as a person and he took a couple deep breaths before taking another three steps, but his vision completely blacked out and his legs buckled beneath him, sending him to the floor and he didn't have any way to stop it, his head trying to make the rest of his body cease to work as it was making _sure_ that he didn't move anymore.  
  
"......c'mon, jack." he spat through clenched teeth once his vision faded back, not back to normal but well enough that he could see where he was, and the blonde pushed himself onto his hands and knees, holding his head with one hand and feeling his arm shake as it supported his upper weight, his nausea increasing more and more by the second.  
  
two steps, just two more steps and he'll be in the kitchen.  
  
jack tried to get back to his feet, but his limbs were shaking too much for him to even get onto one knee, vision still being weird as hell and the blonde decided to just lay down on the floor, feeling the cool cement against his face and he curled up, closing his eyes and breathing heavy through his stomach's desperate cramping and his head's angry throbbing.  
  
maybe that'll stop after a small break.  
  


**•••**

  
"---up buddy, c'mon."

jack slowly opened his eyes, his head still aching and stomach still sickeningly empty, feeling a hand on his shoulder and his eyes landing on a someone's jean-covered legs kneeling down on the ground, slowly looking up and seeing dean hovering over him, face filled with worry; ".......dean?" he whispered and the hunter gave him a gentle smile, but jack's chest just ached as he realized that he had failed to make it to the kitchen.  
  
if he was incapable of moving twenty steps, how the hell was he going to save the world?  
  
"did the floor seem like a good place to nap?" dean joked and jack tried to push himself up, but his body still wasn't okay with movement and he laid back down, letting out a frustrated sigh at how pathetic he was, feeling dean gently wrap his arms around him and lift him into a sitting position, jack whimpering as his head spun from the movement, "i gotcha, kiddo, you're okay." dean cooed and jack wanted to say that he wasn't okay, that he was a pathetic child who made his own body so mad that it wouldn't let him get to the room next to his own.  
  
but, he was just too tired and hurt to form that many words; ".....it was just ten steps."  
  
"what?"  
  
"i couldn't get to the kitchen." he breathed out, holding his head as he stared down at the floor, "only ten steps and i couldn't do it." he added and he pressed his lips together, getting the incredible urge to cry and having to force his body not to, "you got close." dean tried and jack couldn't stop the pitiful whimpery sound that escaped his lips, "i can't do anything." he whispered and dean tightened his grip around jack before carefully lifting the boy to his feet, jack gripping dean's sleeve as his head throbbed and his legs nearly gave out again.  
  
"you stable?"  
  
".....yeah."  
  
"good, now take a step." dean spoke and jack sighed before he slowly and shakily moved a foot forward, taking a single step and watching dean do the same, "awesome, keep going." he cooed and jack took another slow step towards the kitchen, dean mirroring his action and they kept this up until they managed to reach the kitchen table, dean lowering jack into a chair, "well, look at that, you made it."

jack looked up at dean, the hunter having bright grin on his face and the nephilim wanted to argue that if dean hadn't picked him up off the floor and held him up, then he wouldn't have gotten here, but.....he was here.  
  
"i.....i guess i did."  
  
dean gave jack a pat on the shoulder, "alright, what were y'looking for? breakfast?" he asked as he walked to the fridge and jack just nodded as dean turned to look at him, not knowing that it was apparently breakfast time and dean nodded back, "coming right up!" he announced with a wide smile and jack couldn't stop himself from smiling too.

**Author's Note:**

> don't mind the spelling/grammar mistakes. i'm lazy by nature and don't pay attention to things.


End file.
